Day 10 (prayer)

Today wasn't much of a productive day but a good day either way.  No, I didn't workout.  No, the business plan did not get touched.  I didn't even read my Bible tonight.  But, it's ok.

Today I spent time with my family.  I let my wife get some sleep and I hung out with my daughter from the time I got home until it was her bed time.  Then I spent time and had some deep convo with the wife.

So with that being said, all that is really on my mind is a prayer.

Lord, help me to not esteem myself higher than anyone.  Help me to be grateful for all I have, and take nothing for granted.  Help me Lord to humble myself to do all that I am required without complaining or grumbling.  Help me to walk in love at all times.  Thank you Lord.

-Tali

Day 9 (Clear Conscious)

Today was a good day, very productive.  I guess Mondays aren't too bad after all.  I worked on the business plan today and still think those things are overly difficult.  I also got some sketching done at work and getting a better understanding of how to use the wisdom I have of figure drawing.  I had a tough workout today too and man am I still sore from last week.  With all that being said there is something bigger on my mind right now.

I was reading my "Imitation of Christ" book, which I have found very insightful thus far, and found something that made me really think about my life.  One quote from the book says "If thou consider what thou art within thee, thou wilt not care what men talk of thee.  Man looketh on the countenance, but God on the heart.  Man considereth the deeds, but God weigheth the intentions".  In short, if I doing things with a clear heart, a clear conscious then I would not care what others thought and I would be at peace with myself.

That now leads to the question, do I agree with all my actions and words each day?  The answer, well, is no.  I can not say that I have a clear conscious when I look at my last 24 hours.  Don't get me wrong I am not hurting anybody, or doing some other horrible feat, but I could be better.  

So now I my journey is bigger than the 4 goals mentioned on day 1.  My ultimate goal is to be at peace with my own soul.  My goal is for each of my actions to be done with a clear conscious and honest intentions.  365 one step at a time.  I will get there, I will conquer self.

-Tali

Day 8

Today is day 8 (as you can tell by the title) and what a nice easy day it was.  The reason being... I had no workout scheduled for today, yesss.  Besides that, I was pretty lazy today, a little too lazy actually.

I don't really have too much to say today.  Hey I am only human, love it or hate it I am me.

-Tali

Day 7 (Wisdom and Understanding)

Of course on a Saturday I would expect to get everything that I needed to done.  I don't have to work, just run a few errands so it's easy.  I think that is a good and bad thing, when I think I have all this "free time" there is no urgency to get things done.  I tell myself I can relax for another hour or something like that next thing you know I am scrambling to get done everything I wanted to.

The workout for today was Balance & Agility and out of the 5 different workout videos I have done so far this has been one of the hardest.  I have been there a lot of different workout routines in my life because of sports (soccer, basketball, baseball, track, boxing), but half these exercises I have never seen before.  It was fun, but like I said it was very tough.  Just like in life balance seems like such an easy concept but it is so hard to achieve.  We wish we could spend more time doing that or this, or less time in other areas, but it is all about balance.

I have also been thinking my latest reading of Proverbs 4.  The whole pretty much keeps telling me "get wisdom and get understanding".  It just got me thinking of how many people know what may be the right thing today but may not understand why it is the right thing to do.  Wisdom is only half the equation, but it does take you pretty far.  The wisdom might tell us how it is done, but if everything is not perfect and we don't understand why then that little imperfection can completely throw us off our path.  It is the difference between you changing the engine in your car and an educated mechanic changing it.

We all have the wisdom that we would love to have a balanced life, but when do we put in the time to gain understanding of how to properly do it.

-Tali

Day 6 (reconnect)

I am pretty exhausted right now, but I have to keep track of each day.  So today was day six and jeez... what a workout today.  The had to do a "Fight Conditioning" video for the RushFit program.  There were so many different combination of punches, elbows, kicks, knees, and more that is was just plain ole hard to keep up.  Tough but I enjoyed it.

I have to say that I am already feeling a difference.  I feel more energetic, and I am noticing I can handle more in the workouts.  Most importantly there has also been a mental shift.  I am also reconnecting with my mission, the reason why I used to write all the time, why I made some drawings, and the reason why I even started a business.  I am feeling more motivated and purposeful which is a great thing.

There are things I want to accomplish in this life of mine.  There is a message that I want to leave behind.  I want to stand for something good, something positive...and the new me can spread this message to inspire and strengthen others.  This journey wont just change my life.

-Tali

Day 5 (Challenge vs Opportunity)

Well to start off, yes I did my work out today.  I also took some time and did some research for my business plan...But there was something more eventful for today I want to talk about.

Today I was saw a way that if I could make it happen would be a great breaking point for my business.  I would be able to sell my shirts in a large venue filled with people that are considered my target market.  The thing I found interesting about it all is that my initial response/thought was I have a challenge in front of me.  This bothered me a little bit because challenge means I am unlikely to overcome it.  Challenge means that I have yet to reach that type of level and may not reach it.  Challenge means I am starting off losing and I need to prove I can win.  I had to take a second to question that thinking.

I eventually realized this is not a challenge but an opportunity.  This was an opportunity to rise up and be better.  This was an opportunity to show what I can do, and that I am willing to put in the work to make things happen.  Opportunities come with the mindset of confidence, but humble enough to know you still have to earn it.  Why would I ever accept the mindset of challenge?  Not something I want to do anymore, today is a new day.  Each day is a new me, time to grow up and take these opportunities to shine.   And with that.  Good night.

-Tali

Day 4 (Push through)

What a day, what a day.  I hate how sometimes in life there are things, people, events, or lack of any of the three that seem to really sap your energy.  It kills your joy and with it, all type of motivation to do much of anything.  Today was one of those days.  I wont get into detail but I will just say my motivation and focus was below zero

With no motivation I was very tempted to push off working out today... wasn't in the mood.  But, I had to push through.  If I wait for every great day to take steps to reach my goals I will never make it there.  I had to get the determination of no matter how I am feeling I have to push through it.  For me to stop would be like pulling the car over every time it rained when going for a road trip... pointless.  The only question is why did I always accept "I'm not in the mood" before?  Doesn't matter, only thing that matters now is that I never do it again.  The workout was great though, very tough but great.  I feel like I had more energy today already.  So let's keep it going.  I'm feeling GOOD.

Oh and I also had a meeting to go over my business plan today.  That was pretty enlightening and also encouraging.  I have a lot more work to do, but at least now I know I am headed in the right direction.  I did watch a drawing tutorial today, but again.... I didn't draw anything today.  I am slacking there and I need to step it up in that area.

Anyways, I am off to go read some of my book and the Bible.   Annndddddddd night.

-Tali

Day 3

Well day 3 is done...well sort of.  I still plan on doing some Bible reading after this.  Anyways I have to admit I was/am a bit sore today after the hard workout yesterday.  Today I didn't have to do one of the RushFit videos (thank God), but my schedule says to do cardio.  I ended up doing the elliptical type machine that I have in the house for 15mins.  I admit, I probably should of done 30... ok I know I should of done at least 30 minutes.  I have to remind myself just because I am not doing a video doesn't mean I can slack.  It's a process.

I didn't do any drawing or sketching today but I am sort of ok with that.  I am ok with it because I did a lot of reading in that Imitation of Christ book that I got.  I have to admit there is some real gems in there.  One thing that was mentioned as long as I care what everybody else is doing or thinking, I will never have peace.  I have to recognize when I worrying what others are doing or thinking and more importantly when I am changing my behavior because of those thoughts.  So many other gems I could share but I will save them for another time.

Tomorrow I have a phone meeting with a mentor to go over a business plan.  I need to do another one of the RushFit videos, and I need to run some errands.  Hopefully I manage my time well, that is my only hope to get it all done.  Another step taken towards my goals, let's go.

-Tali

Day 2 (Sweat it out)

Well here is day two of the journey and I am feeling good.  Sure most people feel good at the beginning but do they persevere?  Well I don't care what most people do I plan to make it through and accomplish what I started, failure is no longer an option.

Today was day one of the work out, and man I don't think I ever sweated as much as I did through that work out.  Sweat out all the stress, sweat out all the doubt, sweat out all the pain.  It was tough, very tough but I pushed through it.  I would lie if I said I didn't need to take a breather once or twice, but I finished it.  So I am proud of myself and feeling good that I am taking the steps towards my goals.

Work today was ok, typical day...don't want to get too much into all that stuff.  What I will say is that I took the opportunity to watch a 16 minute figure drawing tutorial and took some time to practice what I learned during lunch.  I am working smarter, finding time in which I can take steps to reach my goals.

One day at a time I am keeping my eye on the prize.  I have things to accomplish in my life, and if I am not spending my days reaching there...where is my life going?  I have drifted by on hopes and positive thoughts for long enough. Even the bible says nothing changes without action.

James 2:17
"Even so faith, if it hath not works, is dead, being alone"

- Tali

Day 1 (It begins)

So this is how it will all begin.  I am 29, married with a 9 month old.  I work full-time, and also trying to start a business.  This blog is a log of journey for year starting today.  In my current state I am not happy with my life.  I am not happy with my career, my health (physically and mentally), or my spiritual life.  I am tired all the time, not motivated to do much, stressed out and been feeling pretty empty.

Today starts my year of change, and blogging is going to help me keep track, and be honest with myself.  I have made 4 goals for this year that I plan to successfully complete.

1) Strengthen my spiritual life and relationship with God
2) Get back in shape, and be in even better shape than I ever was
3) Really start focusing on building my business and bringing in income
4) Start drawings regularly and make an animation demo reel I am proud of

Tomorrow starts my workout plan which is an 8 week plan.  I going to be doing the RushFit workout by that MMA fighter George St. Pierre.  I ordered it a long time ago and never did it, just made excuses.

Yesterday I just got a book called "Imitation of Christ" which is pretty interesting.  It is made up of many different devotionals.  Once and a while I will share the insight.  I think today's lesson ties right in to what I am doing right now in my life.  It states "Who hath a harder struggle than he that laboureth to conquer himself?  This ought to be our endeavour, to conquer ourselves, and daily so wax stronger than ourselves, and to make some progress for good"

Anyways, it is way too hot in here to stay typing so see you tomorrow.

-Tali